We went on down to the casino, got our cards and got started on the FUN. I played the slots because that is the only thing I know how to play. I was mainly sitting there wondering what James and I were going to do about this situation. A waitress came by and asked if I would like a drink? A DRINK? A DRINK? A DRINK? YES, YES, YES. I WANT A DRINK! Just what I need to do is pour alcohol in on top of this – right? She brought me a drink and I tipped her two dollars. More coins in slots, more indecision, more drinks. I got up to go find some quiet place so I could call James on the cell phone. My knees were like water. Good Grief. I grabbed hold of the stool I had been sitting on. The waitress showed up again and asked if I were okay and did I want another drink. I told her I did not want another drink and that those drinks were really strong. She said “Well yes, when you tip me two dollars rather than one dollar, I make them doubles; that is what I always do”. DOUBLES!!! GOOD GRIEF!!! What is the word you use when a person is simply lacking is worldly experience? Such as casinos? Gambling? Getting out in the world? Naive? Innocent? Stupid? Dumb?
I worked my way out to the lobby by hanging on to each of the stools I came to. I brushed against one old man and he leered up at me; I guess if a man is 90 years old, a 70 year old woman looks young.
I found a relatively quiet place and called James and left a message to call me. Next time they stopped he called me. I asked where they were. He said “We are almost to Jefferson; I’ll be seeing you in a few minutes.” “You may be almost to Jefferson but you won’t be seeing me in a few minutes.” “What are you talking about?” I gave it all to him at once – “This trip is not to Jefferson; it is to Shreveport to play in the casino and we are not going home tomorrow; we are going home Monday.” Silence------------. I could tell his mouth was gaped open too. More silence------- and then we both laughed.
I sat down in the lobby to think some more. Okay, decisions. James and I can’t stay up all night so we have to have a room. It is logical that we go home tomorrow since this is an activity that we don’t enjoy.
I go back into the casino to find Cathy and tell her this. She says there is some kind of convention in town and they may not have another room. Okay, more thinking. I think this is the kind of place where if you want any kind of help, there needs to be a tip involved. Remember the drinks. I have a billfold full of twenties; after all I was prepared to buy a few small antiques in Jefferson.
I go to the lady standing guard at the entrance to the casino and tell her my problem. She is not interested – just says there is a cattle show in town and there may not be any rooms. Then she looked down and saw I was handing her a twenty dollar bill and she did exactly the thing each person after her did. “Oh, you don’t have to do that” and swoosh the twenty goes into the pocket. “But let me get Edna, she can help you.” She gets on her cell phone and Edna appears. She explains my problem to Edna as I hold out the twenty – “Oh, you don’t have to do that” and swoosh the twenty goes into the pocket. Edna takes me down to the desk and asks for Juanita. Edna explains to Juanita while I slide a twenty across the counter – “Oh you don’t have to do that” and swoosh into the pocket. Juanita explains there is a cattle show in town and they don’t have any rooms here but she will call her friend at the Holiday Inn on the river. She gets off the phone and says we have a room and here is the confirmation number. In fact it is their penthouse rooms for the same price as a double to apologize for us having so much trouble in their town. When we get ready to leave, ask the lady at the door to call a Holiday Inn courtesy car to take us to the other hotel.
Gee, maybe it was worth the twenties.
When the men on bikes arrive James and I look at each other and laugh. Some people can have adventures without even trying. Jack hugs me and apologizes. It is not his fault that I did not check on the details of this trip. I explain to them what I have planned for us. One of the other men says he has his wife’s helmet in his bike and we can borrow it. I am so relieved; I think it is stupid to ride without a helmet but I was ready to do it. We hang around with the rest of the group for a while and then tell them bye and ask for a courtesy car.
We get in the courtesy car and take off. We are going east. I am familiar with taxies going the long way around to run up the tab; but he is just working for tips; so I mention that I thought we were going to the Holiday Inn on the river. “Oh really? They called me over at Bossier. I thought you were going back there”. Big U-turn in the middle of the street. When we get to the hotel – a little old looking, the driver puts our two pitifully small over night cases on the luggage hauler and I hand him a twenty “Oh you don’t have to-------------“ James mentions that was a pretty big tip and I agree that it was.
We check in and go up to the penthouse. It is really big and was probably really pretty - about twenty years ago. No wonder we can have the penthouse, certainly no one else will want it.
We go to the bar and James has a few drinks. I have a few Coca Colas; I am not interested in having liquid knees again this soon.
The next morning we go back to the other Holiday Inn to have breakfast and get James’ bike.
I see the restaurant has eggs Benedict which I love because I adore hollandaise sauce. It arrives and the hollandaise sauce is not a really good hollandaise but I eat it. The manager comes around and asks if I liked the eggs Benedict? No, not really – the hollandaise was not real hollandaise. “Well since we are in Cajun country we think it should have a Cajun flavor.” “Oh.” I don’t ask for a refund since I have eaten it and he does not offer a refund – maybe I should have pulled out another twenty.
The trip home was WONDERFULLY UNEVENTFUL.
I hope you enjoyed the tale. I realize it is long but believe me every single bit of it is TRUE.
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