Monday, June 11, 2012

GOOD TIMES, BAD TIMES


I guess we have settled into living with dementia. Some times are good and some times are not so good.

The other day some ladies were here playing bridge. It was my time to bid and James came wondering in from the bedroom and stood behind me. He said “You're not going to let her bid are you? Especially with that hand”. And we all laughed; that is exactly the kind of thing he would have said before he got sick.

A few days ago my friend, Karen was saying how upset she had been but she went home and talked it over with her husband and then felt better about the whole thing. That was a little unexpected knife thrust into my heart. I will never again be able to talk things over with James and feel better about them. Not Karen's fault – just a fact of life with dementia.

I still thank the Lord he is easy to get along with. He has gone down physically a little more. Doesn't walk as well.

We are having a wedding in the family this Friday night – our daughter's daughter. There are all kinds of contingent plans made for James. If he gets restless at the reception or whenever, our son will take him home and stay with him and I can stay for the festivities. And I expect that to happen. His patience are thin and he gets bored easily when he is not at home in his own little nest. He won't remember the wedding by the time he gets home and we could easily get someone to stay with him but then we would not have him in any of the wedding pictures.

There is a picture of my grandfather who died before I was born. Every time my mother would see that picture she would remark, “That was taken after he got sick”. I think James in these wedding pictures might be like that.